Well today was fun. I began by reading the morning e-mail only to discover that one of my key employees had resigned. She had done so for health reasons which prohibit her from traveling. Keeping everything in perspective, me trying to find another employee is a lot less important than her dealing with a health issue. However, this really puts me in a bind. My little company had invested a lot of time and money into growing the training part of the business and now that we are finally ready to reap the benefits she is gone leaving us with a void and a rush to backfill. Finding a trainer that can travel is very difficult in my profession which brings about a question about the long term prospects of the business itself if we don't find one.
So here I am questioning what will happen in my "business" world while another part of me that doesn't care about that at all is saying "Hey Hey! Shut this thing down so I can focus on energy work" And there inlies my dilemma...(and I bet I am not the only one asking this) but how can I continue to privide financially for my family while at the same time do the work that I truly care about?
3 comments:
sorry, a bit long. But I hope it gives you positive energy...
As I mentioned in another post, I attended a Conflict Management class today, with Dr. Kim (http://www.drkimspeaks.com/). She told us a story about herself. A Ph.D. in Interpersonal Communication and Administration with a Spiritual Emphasis, she was a VP in a hospital, making a lot of money. Her husband, a smart educated man, was making a bit less. Due to her high wages, they could afford a huge house, exotic cars, a nice lifestyle and keep a 850 credit rating. Dr.Kim always wanted to be a motivational speaker. One day, she woke up knowing that she has to quit her job and start on the path to her passion. With her education and experience (look at the website, she's done many things), she was confidant that she would find a job. She gave 30 day notice that morning. To make a long story short, she hadn’t found anything for two years. Her husband got a second job. They lost the cars, the house and their credit. She worked as a receptionist during the day, cleaning houses on weekends, delivering paper in the morning (with a PhD). The desperation was brutal. After two years, she came to terms with her new life, and said that she is happy with it even if her money never comes back and her dream job never becomes reality. Soon after, she got her break, big time. She thinks that our dream does not come until we are happy without it. She feels that if she came in terms with her loss sooner, she would have found the job sooner too. Here is the note I took from that segment : "Be OK that you may never get what you really want. If you get it, all will be well. If you don't get it, all will be well. Get the desperation out of your life. Hold on "loosely" to everything in life. When you hold on "tightly" (to kids, job, money, dreams) paranoia and obsession can develop of getting it or keeping it/loosing it, which is difficult. It is not in your control. Enjoy today, let go of obsession."
So, I think I can look at your situation in couple of ways. If the business really doesn't survive, so what? I am sure you will do your best to keep it going. If despite your efforts the company does not stay afloat, don't you know that you will be OK? Don't you know that a window opens when a door is closed? One way or another. May be difficult at times, but you know you will be OK. For your question about your true passion, you can either pursue it professionally or not. Again, you will be OK either way. Dr.Kim pursued it, but paid for it. I am sure there were many night when it seemed like a stupid idea. Yet now she is very happy. And if it's not your career, it's OK too, right? Real life difficulties provide such a great way to have the experiences to think about and learn from!
I will finish off by saying the phrase Dr. Kim started and ended the class with (not to exact words, though, but you've heard it before many times - if you always do what you always do, you will always get what you always get. If you want to get something new, you must try to do something new. I have also hear recently (from who, I really don't remember), that obstacles on our way are placed their to see if we REALLY want it, to take out the people who will give up because they don't really want it. Do you REALLY want it??? Then do something different, but you KNOW, it will be difficult, you will be challenged to see how badly you want it. Would you have it any other way???
As I look at my professional life in retrospect I see that I have achieved exactly what I wanted. Everything I had asked my powers for I had received and all the while knowing that this is not what I truly desire. And that feeling keeps bubbling up and up and expressing itself in negativity and health weaknesses. Yes I get what I ask for and yes I learn a lot because they let me play my games and through becoming aware I see it unfold....and they have shown me the way to do what I truly choose to do....and yet I ignore it for feeling it is too difficult and my house is too expensive and what will others think and all other ready made excuses...I light up when I walk into a room of likeminded people, I bathe in the energies, I awaken and seek it but haven't gone over that hump. But I am getting close and now, thanks to all of you I am doing something different. I am finally writing, little by little, word by word as I reintroduce myself to my soul self. Oh, yes, and one more thing - life is balance if you chose it..and I do...there is nothing that says that I cannot start writing and practising and developing my talents while I "function" in the business world and when the time is right I will make the final switch. For now however I wow to keep on writing and start my book in the very near future. Mashenka, thanks for thoughts and your responses, they keep me going :)
Absolutely, you can do both business and spirituality. I also started writing dowm some of my ideas, and found it very helpful. It is difficult to switch because we started out planning our life one way, now we are bound by our earlier commitments. Some of them can be reversed, but all involved parties have to be on board, making it complicated. Esspecially when kids are involved. Tough one. Yet again, it doesn't have to be "all or nothing", can be "both".
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